Wednesday, October 23, 2013

None Shall Pass: Why I Hate Passwords

My cell phone has a password.

My laptop has a password, as does the computer of every member of the family.

The family iPad has a password.

When my son plays a game on his computer (which, remember, already required a password), he needs another password for the game, even though the CD for that game is in the computer’s drive.

I need a password to order books from the library online.

I need a password to see my kids’ homework assignments (and my kids have their own, different passwords for that same website).

Want to download a free app on my phone? Better have the Apple Store password.

Want to watch something on Netflix or read an online newspaper? Better have the damn passwords.

And according to experts, these passwords need to be different from each other and changed frequently and they need to contain both letters and numbers – oh, and they should make no sense whatsoever or somebody might guess what they are, and even though you purposely just made them impossible to remember, don’t you dare write them down anywhere. Got that?

At least one expert recommends lying on those security questions sites have, like “What’s your mother’s maiden name?” and “Where did you first meet your significant other?” I have a hard enough time inputting the real answers correctly. When I typed in a city, did I put the city and the state? Did I capitalize every word in the title of my favorite book?

My husband recently started using Dashlane, an online password manager. That’s great, except this service, which requires its own password, doesn’t always work (particularly with newer operating systems).

In fact, I’m pretty sure the only person Dashlane has kept out of our accounts is me.

Yup, I hate passwords.


  1. OMG, I had to laugh because the other day I was faced with a password dilemma AGAIN!
    So, now finally, I have handwritten all my usernames and passwords...for reference. Like you said...there are just to many. and the good rule of thumb is you need to change your password from time to time to avoid problems. Ugh!

  2. I have so many freakin' passwords, for both serious and frivolous purposes that I can't even... A friend likes OneNote or somesuch, but I'm paranoid about putting all passwords in one place. What if I forget THAT password? I hate it all. And this is why many of my passwords have taken on increasingly sarcastic tones.